Home in Mississippi for the new year 2010

Twenty days ago we flew out of Mississippi on this incredible journey to Bhubaneswar Orissa to meet our new daughter for the first time. Last night we return home to Starkville, Mississippi.
I'm not eloquent enough to put into words our feelings. The adoption process has challenged us and the past 20 days were filled with many sleepless nights and questions on if we could do this?
Now each day reminds us how much we are blessed and humbled to be her parents.
Last night at the local airport, her grandparents Mike and Margaret Reardon met us at the airport to greet their new grand-daughter. We celebrate Maggie Sonia with all our friends and family.

Happy New Year 2010 to all!!!

Grandpa Mike and Nanna with Maggie Sonia

Fun in the snow

 Its been 11 days since she joined us.....Words don't describe our feelings seeing Maggie Sonia playing with us in the snow.

Merry Christmas 2009

This is our first Christmas together! The smiles in the pictures below says it all -- we (mostly Mary) haven't slept much (maybe less than 5 hours the past 3 days) but we are slowing but surely growing together as one family. Maggie Sonia still misses her care-takers at SMSS.
This transition is slow -- she's bonded with Mary but I'm a work in progress and we are seeing little signs of her acceptance of us : she is eating well; she's started to communicate with us by signing some of the words we are teaching her. Sometimes she has an infectious belly laugh!! and now has started to play with some toys.

HOME!!!

WE HAVE LANDED!!!

We landed in Minneapolis, Minnesota at 12:10 on December 23 !!!

Oh what a feeling when we stepped off the plane after almost 24 hours : We left the hotel in Delhi at 8:00 pm on Tuesday 22nd -- our first leg was a KLM flight to Amsterdam -- our flight was four hours late so we spent 7 hours at the international terminal in Delhi -- which is a work in progress -- note: they check your passports just to get into the terminal; then the signage is very poor in the terminal to find the airline desk -- If you fly KLM, they are the only airlines that check your adoption documents ! We didn't know that! and they also wanted to photo copy it : the NOC and the court guardianship. The security check-in went smoothly. We recommend coming early to the airport and then have lots of activities for your little one while you wait -- the Delhi international terminal isn't like the one in Amsterdam so the services our limited.

Well after we boarded the flight -- Maggie Sonia did fine all the way to Amsterdam (about a 9 hours flight). We had a lovely KLM stewardess who took care of us on the flight and even gave us a gift for Maggie Sonia!! (Unfortunately our second leg of the flight with Delta Airlines was just awful -- I almost lost it with the 2 stewardess assigned to our section! -- but there was too much joy with us to make the poor Delta service spoil our journey home.

Resting before the flight at the ITC lounge in Delhi International terminal.

 

With the delay in taking off from Delhi, we didn't have a layover in Amsterdam. After we landed, we walked to our 2nd leg of the flight 2 gates over in Amsterdam for the horrible Delta Airline flight to Minneapolis.....we were so excited that we followed each hour of it on the seat monitor....with Mary saying "Are we there yet" like a little kid! It was rather cute....We forgot to pack some toys for Maggie for the flights...we highly recommend some blocks or crayons or other active play toys (we only had books) so the remote control for the in-flight entertainment became her toy. Also don't forget to pack favorite snacks. Our flight ended early at 12:10 pm on December 23 just in time for the major snow storm to start here! I felt like kissing the ground when we landed jusk like the pope :+)

The custom lines were long, but there were expecting us and for a change we got some needed special treatment by going to the front of the line! The custom service officer was super. After he checked our passports, we had a little official opening of the brown envelop from the US Embassy! It was official -- Maggie is ours. Within 10 minutes we were done --American efficiency at its best! He welcomed all of us to the United States.....what a relief! This was a 3 years journey for us. We both high fived and did the hugest group hug!!!
We've done it. WE ARE HOME! Physically and emotionally exhausted ! and Mary hasn't slept for 48 hours -- caring for Maggie Sonia takes all her time and she still will not come to me yet ... so I'm a little useless on that department but she is beginning to trust me and it will work out fine......what a wonderful joyous Christmas present for us....

I love Mary and Maggie Sonia!

A blessed Merry Christmas to all who have followed us through this journey....bye for now.

Christmas Eve in Minnesota -- this isn't Bhubaneswar, Orissa :+)

Casey Pasko and Maggie Sonia sledding.

We are flying home with our little Maggie Sonia!!

We fly home on December 23rd !! The next 24 hours on the airplane should be interesting?!!! We are hoping our little one will sleep through the first leg to Amsterdam.
For those following our flight home: we are flying Northwest/KLM flight NW8366 to Amsterdam and NW0241 to Minneapolis Minnesota.

WE ARE GOING HOME WITH MAGGIE SONIA!!!

The American Embassy approved Maggie Sonia to travel to the USA with us this afternoon at 1:30 pm. YEAH!! After 3 years, we have reached the end of the adoption process. There are many people to thank for it but most certainly the staff at Wide Horizons for Children in particular our India co-ordinator Eileen Minnucci; the American Embassy and all its staff; Catholic charities in Mississippi for the home study and Michelle Parisi who notarized all the many documents for us.

The visa process at the Embassy went smoothly. Our appointment was schedule for 9:00 am. The Embassy is only 5 minutes from this hotel (The ITC Maurya). We had walked to it from the hotel last week for a test run but we don't recommend it with a baby so today we had a driver. We arrived at the embassy at 8:35 and there was a long line already. We were ushered to a room that looks like our local DMV but larger by two orders of magnitude. Its not a kids friendly room. Each person is given a # and ours was O6. On a typical day, over 700 to a 1000 applicants go through this office but we were the only adoption case today. An hour later we were called to the first of three window booth (kind of like in the bank) which eventually will lead to the interview by the consular staff. The 2nd window is the cashier : $400 for our visa -- could this be the last of the $$ for the adoption process ? (credit cards are accepted). After we paid the fee, we waited for the interview. Its held open to the room so everyone can hear and see what's going on. (I would think they would have taken us to a conference room. Also there aren't any areas for kids to play or relax while you wait). We waited for about 2 hours before we were called for the interview.

The actual process was straightforward. We had to take an oath and then the consulate officer verified our documents. We had to give her the following : passport, NOC document (its a copy),guardianship court document and abandonment certificate.Then we explained that we needed to go back to the doctor's office for the 3 remaining shots to receive the medical review form. We were done by 11:30 and on our way to the doctor's office for the remaining shots. (Dr. Chawla's office is not far from the Embassy). His address is 37 Prithviraj Road Delhi near Khan market.

The doctor , Mary and Maggie Sonia

Not so fun immunization shots time!

Sunday December 20: A restful day with Maggie Sonia in Delhi

Maggie Sonia and Mary continue to be attached to the hip -- literarily. We spent Saturday visiting Doctor Chawla, a Harvard and Beth Israel Deaconess trained physician (another sign how small this world is -- Mary worked at Beth Israel for 14 years and may have crossed paths).

The Doctor visit went fine except to get the Visa she needs 6 shots to complete the immunization requirement for the I-800 case (*** Note: currently there is no waiver for I-800 case for the US adoption irregardless what your adoption agency says --the waiver form is only for I-600 case). We recommend in hindsight that all the immunization should be completed by the orphanage to prevent this delay. (I apologize for waking up all the WHFC folks at 1:00 am EST in a panic mode on Saturday -- thank you all for responding to our questions). We completed 3 of her shots on Saturday and plan to return on Monday for the remaining 3 so that we can pass the medical portion of the visa requirement -- Unfortunately we have the embassy appointment at 9:00 am on Monday -- this will delay us by a day to get her visa and final approval to travel home. The cost for the 6 shots and doctors visit was 9200 Rupees.

Maggie Sonia at the doctor's office

We continue to struggle as new parents (I don't think I read enough books on how to decipher a baby's needs). She still is not sleeping when needed -- she has yet to walk around or play -- she just wants to be held by Mary when she is awake!

Here's a story the Puttkammers and my brothers would appreciate.

To get Maggie Sonia to sleep, we went for a short car ride. Our driver took us to F21-22 Hauz Kaus!!

The current owner is F.S. Nariman and is wife Bapsi who have owned it for 37 years. Well long story short, we were invited for a nice tea and biscuits and spent an hour in their courtyard. He is a lawyer and MP and Bapsi is a social activtist and writer. (He argued the Union Carbide case in the Indian supreme court.).

Maggie Sonia and Mary with Bapsi and F.S. Nariman

Day 2 and 3 : Challenging days with no sleep for Mary

Day 2 and 3 were tough days for us. Maggie Sonia is grieving for her care-takers and we are struggling with the ethics of taking her away from all the people that loved her so much.
None of the books really prepares you for these challenges. One of the biggest hurdles for us is that we don't speak or understand Oriya -- but we have a english-oriya dictionary which helps just a bit.

So the 1st and 2nd day was spent walking the hallways of the hotel at some ungodly hours to keep Maggie Sonia from crying -- lugging 20 lbs isn't good for the back and 2 days without sleep sucks. Unfortunately she will only go to Mary so I can't help -- there will be a day soon when she'll come to me. Mary hasn't slept for two days....



Helpful hints for those following us to SMSS:
The staff and care takers genuinely love the children, and with limited resources are doing their best in raising 60 girls. Dr. Smurti Mohanty is in charge of the international adoption and is a good resource for questions on the process and status of the kids (she can be contacted via email).
The orphanage is about 20 minutes from the Trident hotel outside the city limits of Bhubaneswar.
When you arrive at SMSS -- the kids will just come to you and want to be held. Its quite chaotic --initially you will not get any one on one time with the child. Our first day we spent more time talking to Mr.Mohanty (the director of SMSS) than being with Maggie.
On the first day, it will be mentioned that a going away lunch is expected and hosting it will be 10000 rupees (that was a cost we didn't expect but were glad to be part of it --but with typical Indian-English translation we had to hold the lunch not on the day Maggie left but two days later). Mary and Maggie stayed at the hotel for this lunch because it would be very traumatic for her to go back.
Dr. Smurti Mohanty is the only one that speaks English but its difficult to understand her completely. There's a lot of the "Indian waggle" going on during the conversations -- you have to visit India to get what it is! :+)
Bring bug spray -- the mosquitoes are big and fierce.
If you are planning to give any in-kind donations to the orphanage : here's what we observed. The school age kids loved the multi-subject activity work books. Pencils, erasures, writing books and books for little kids are needed. During play time they could really use more soft balls to play catch, jumping ropes -- but the space is very confined so we think even board games would be fun especially for
the older kids. The major construction addition that is in progress but halted due to lack of funds needs
approximately 17 lakhs rupees. (Our catholic church in Starkville Mississippi raised over $4500 the week before we left for SMSS which we will send to them after we return home).
Gift in kind is suggested for all the caretakers (there are 15). It was also suggested we give Maggie's two caretakers 500 rupees. Mary made a gift bag of lipstick,nail polish, shampoo and hand cream but we only had enough for 9. It was well received by all.
And most of all, be prepared to want to take more than one child home with you -- emotionally that is the toughest.

Lunch in honor of Maggie Sonia at SMSS started with playtime.

Lunch was mutton with potatoes (it was more fat than meat and there was only one piece of meat on each plate but everyone got seconds), cauliflower, eggplant, salad and rice.

Washing hands before lunch

Mary and Maggie Sonia.....

Mommy Mary and baby Maggie Sonia at breakfast : Thursday morning

It was rather a difficult night. Its taking 110% of our efforts right now to get our little one settled down. Since we left the orphanage 20 hours ago, she hadn't eaten or drank anything. She really really missed her care-takers!!
But this morning we had our little miracles at the restaurant in the hotel during our breakfast time!
There's another family (from Spain) that have adopted a little girl from SMSS -- we heard a "Hi Sonia" from the back....and our little one perked up ...and the smile was magic.

December 16 2009 : Maggie Sonia is with us

Its the toughest thing we have ever done.
We are taking our Maggie Sonia away from her care-takers Lebi and Asmina Nayak.

Words can't describe our feelings right now....so here are pictures to share our story.....

Mary , Maggie Sonia and Lebi Nayak

Dr.Smurti Mohanty, social worker and her staff of care-takers. She is responsible for the international adoption process at SMSS.

Mr.Mohanty who is the founder and in-charge of SMSS and the other related institutions.